“Paul might want something,” Rob said.

“You sound sus...suspiciously sober,” Luke said, pointing a wavering finger and struggling drunkenly with the letter S. He belched abruptly and they laughed.

“Yeah. It won’t be me in the dentist’s chair this evening at this rate,” said Ed.

Rob held up his hands and grinned.

“You wish, Mr King,” Pete said.

“Don’t call me that,” Ed said in a monotone voice. “She’s going to take my name, I keep telling you.”

“Just not yet,” said Matt.

“Yeah, jus...just not yet.”

“Not on your wedding day, you mean,” said Pete. “Buddy, she’s never going to change it.”

Ed was about to say something when he belched instead. “Ooh, I can taste my breakfast!”

They all burst out laughing.

“What about Paul?” Rob said.

“Screw ‘im!” said Luke.

Pete shook his head. “Yeah, I’m not paying for another drink for him.”

“Why did you invite him, anyway?” said Matt.

Ed rubbed a hand in his naked armpit and shrugged. “It was meant to be the old gang back together again.”

“We’re not at college anymore,” said Luke.

“And that’s the problem,” Pete muttered.

“Has anyone actually met up with him more than once or twice since we left?” said Matt.

Everybody shook their heads except Rob.

“I’ve had dinner with him a few times,” he said.

“Dinner. Exactly.” Pete snorted.

“I think we’ve outgrown him but the problem is he thinks he’s outgrown us,” Luke said, waving his finger again.

Ed sighed. “If he wants something to eat tonight he can have fish and chips.”

“As long as I’m not paying,” Pete muttered.

“A sit-down dinner,” Matt said, shaking his head. “Who has a sit-down dinner for a stag night?”

“Yeah. We’ll be having a lie-down-on-the-floor dinner at this rate!”

They all laughed again.

“Ssh! Here he comes,” Pete hissed.

Paul came back down the aisle, grinning like a loon, with the corner of his shirt poking out of his gaping flies. Nobody laughed as he slipped into his seat. Pete swapped a wicked look with Matt.

“What’d I miss?” Paul asked.

Rob leaned across the table and held a couple of fingers against his mouth. “You’re flying,” he said quietly.

Paul looked at him blankly for a moment, then realised and zipped up his trousers. He looked around their faces and laughed.

They all tittered and lifted their cans.

“Hey,” Paul said. “You’ve got more drinks.”

“The trolley came,” said Ed.

“Oh, you should’ve got me something.”

Pete and Matt looked at each other again.

“You can still catch her up,” Luke said, smiling pleasantly. “She’s only in the next carriage.”

Paul stood up and slapped his pockets. “Anybody got anything? How much are they?”

Nobody was forthcoming.

“Come on,” went Paul, putting his palms on their table and leaning forward. “I’m treating you all to dinner, after all.”

Pete sighed. “Fine. Here. Go.” He fished out a few pound coins.

NOTES:
This whole section was always meant to be Paul's story, the guy who's picked upon simply because he's already the most remote from the group, the safest, most defenceless target, which is a position I've been in before. The 'lads' in this vignette are named after the Gamegossip crew I talk to on MSN a lot; I was already scrabbling for names at this point, which explains why I start reusing ones shortly.